Monday, February 25, 2013

Challenged To Change

"When we are no longer able to change the situation, we are challenged to change ourselves."

I came across this quotation while reading materials to suggest for my next book club meeting. It strikes me to the core and created a challenge for me to write my thoughts. 

It is a fact that at some point in our lives we will encounter people, events or situations that will affect us in one way or another. Sometimes their effect might be so significant that it will cause our lives to change forever. It is this kind of change that I had been through that the quote above reminded me of. 

People change is one of the most uncomfortable thing to deal with but is one of the certain facts of life. They are the ones that can hurt us especially if we are not prepared and not ready for it. When my youngest daughter left home to live on her own (she's 23 so I should have been prepared for it), I felt like mourning for weeks. I have always known that the time will come when my two daughters will be leaving my side. But still, it was hard as a mother to see my baby stepped out of the door to face the world on her own. Situations that we don't see coming can be heartbreaking. We hope and pray that people we deeply care about will be with us forever or a happy situation will stay and not change. But they do. So what we do? In the past, I would challenged the situation. Try to find ways to change it. Sometimes hoping for a person to change and see things the way I did. And as always, I ended up frustrated, sad and sometimes doubted my self confidence for being incapable of making change to happen. As a result, I created negativity in my life that proved to be a hindrance to my personal development and happiness. 

As I continue to journey in this life, experiences have made me fully understand that change is one thing sure about life. In fact, I am not an exception. But I learned that I don't have control over things or people around me. I only have control over myself, my feelings and my reactions towards something or someone. I learned to accept people as they are but I don't allow them or their actions to affect me anymore.  Sometimes, they still do, but life is a series of learning curb. I just have to learn to adjust and make changes to avoid being in the same road again. As soon I realized all of these, life has been less stressful, both personally and professionally. 

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